AGING IS A BIATCH!

GayToday 'Not Easy BeinGAY!'
3 min readMay 14, 2021
Meds

What is the Good Word Doctor?

In Gay’s World, I have many, many Doctors, which addresses many, many ailments.

Oh… the woes.

Waking Up

Indeed. I am truly grateful I wake up in the morning after a good night’s sleep!

But wait! Did I utter the word sleep? I don’t know about you my girlfriends, but sleep is a tough commodity to come by these days.

I do NOT remember the last time I had a good night’s sleep. Fortunately, my memory has been failing me for years, so I forget every day why I am so tired.

Now I remember… I am freakin’ knocked down exhausted because I did NOT get a good night sleep! That must be why I have those inexplicable dark, puffy, god knows what under my eyes all day long.

My intention is not to deviate… but… I am reminded all day long that I am exhausted by the dark puff balls under my eyes. And girlfriends, no fancy, schmancy make-up conceals that shiat under my eyes.

The worst part is when I see my mama. She always asks me, “Gay, what is under your eyes?” I suppose at 83 years of age, she forgets. I tell her every time she asks, I am exhausted! Oh Shiat! Stop askin’ me.

I have a better idea… throw me some cash so I can go to another Doctor, my dermatologist to fix that mess!

Moving on…

The Wellness Doctor

My Sistahood of friends, of course I have a Wellness Doctor. She is an OB-GYN Physician.

Caroline Fiero is one of my many Doctor saviors. As they say in the Handmaids Tale, ‘Praise Be’.

If you did not know, Wellness Doctors send you to a lab to get about 20 vials of blood drawn. Oh yes! I hope you have a good vein! These Doctors test for every type of vitamin, mineral, and hormone deficiency known to modern day medicine.

Some Doctors roll their eyes at the amount of ‘things’ Wellness Doctors test for. I say, “Bring it on Baby!”.

Hormones

Where do our hormones go when we age? Are they with all the lost socks from the laundry?

Well girlfriends, I am very concerned as we get older, we are simply ‘drying’ up. Yes, this is happening to the boy’s club called the ‘Brothahood’. They too are drying up but are just in denial. Keep watchin’ that online porn honey.

Testosterone

When I reviewed my lab results with my Doctor, the first question she asks: “How are you feeling”. Girlfriends, you know my response. I am confident we all have the same response. “EXHAUSTED”!

Apparently, in addition to Estrogen running low, now testosterone is running low. Once again, oh woe is me.

The plan: increase estrogen and testosterone.

Sistah’s, I know what ya thinkin’: If I increase my testosterone, can I become a body builder? Will I be stronger and leap over buildings? I am a fairly fierce, brazen gal. Will my balls get bigger?

I HOPE SO!

For now, sweet dreams!

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GayToday 'Not Easy BeinGAY!'

A Forward Thinker. Humorist. Realist. Author of The Admissions Game, Application Cycle 2020–2021. A Very Former, Assistant District Attorney. gaytoday.blog